Purple Tees So Fine
8/24/2004
I took my money down to Madame Ruth,
Caught her with a bottle of that dry vermouth
She's got the garb for those who are inclined
Sellin' every size of purple tees so fine.
I told her that I was a flop with words
I've just been hanging out with all the other nerds.
She looked at my palm and she made a magic sign
She said, "What you need is a purple tee so fine."
She bent down and turned around and gave me a wink
She said, "I'm gonna fix that faster than you'll ever think."
It looked like a grape, but I felt in the pink.
I raised my arms, I closed my eyes, I had to lip-synch.
I didn't know if it was day or night
I didn't know if all my wrongs were right
But when I gave a buck to Dawn and said, "Be my valentine."
She just thanked me for the money from my purple tee so fine.
And a reprise--
I held my nose, I closed my eyes, I had to lip-synch.
I didn't know if it was day or night
I didn't know if all my wrongs were right.
But when I gave a buck to Dawn and said, "Be my valentine."
She just thanked me for the money from my purple tee so fine.
My purple tee so fi-i-i-ine
My purple tee so fi-i-i-ine.
As Pat says, "Many apologies to Leiber and Stoller,"
and it's "Goodnight" from me!
Madame You-know-who!
Ruth's
Remarkable Parodies