Ruth's Remarkable Parodies
More Ruth's Remarkable Parodies

Willkommen, bienvenue, welcome, Cooleagues!

And now, with a nod and wink, just imagine, here we are in a smoky nightclub in a sophisticated, world-class city, rain running down in what must be admitted to be ever so slightly sleazy back alleys... Look, though, at the next table. Vaguely suspect diamond merchant? Wild-eyed political radical? Former "cigarette girl" made good?  Who knows what characters we may be rubbing elbows with in this cosmopolitan mileau?

And indeed, who cares? You are here to enjoy yourselves, if just for the moment. After all...

What good is fussing about what to wear?
Try dressing with great esprit.
It's time for that special shirt, old chums,
So pull on your purple T.

Put down your grading,
your markers and pen;
next time just hand out the key.
Life is for special shirts, old chums,
So pull on your purple T.

Come read the words,
then write no wrongs.
Recite the poems,
and just start celebrating
Come this Friday
your t shirt’s waiting…

No use correcting
a sentence that runs
beyond where it's meant to be.
Don't make it your denier cri.
Life is for special shirts, old chums,
So pull on your purple T.


I used to have a schedule
for my classes
and then I thought
"Why not simply issue passes?"

It wasn't what you'd call
a hard decision…
as a matter of fact
I think it showed real vision.

The day that Larry found
I'd quit holding office hours
I admit he tried
his most persuasive powers.

But when he saw me dressed up in my shirt,
he knew the scholars' fund
had finally hit pay dirt.

I think of Larry to this very day,
I remember how he’d turn to me and say,
"What good is fussing about what to wear?
Try dressing with great esprit
It's time for that special shirt, old chums,
So pull on your purple T."

And as for me,
I made my mind up, meine Freunden, mon amis
When I dress, I'm dressing for kicks, see?

Just start by donating
your dollar to Dawn;
Rid yourselves of all ennui (!)
It's time for that purple shirt, old chums,
that worthiest T of all, old chums,
so throw on your purple T!
 

Now if that wasn't likely to bring on a great depression, I don't know my stuff!

Auf Wiedersehen... A Bientot... Liebchen!